I was having a chat with a colleague during the past week and I used a phrase that has been rattling around in my head ever since.
I don’t believe in regrets.
It was maybe a strange thing to say as part of a conversation – we had been talking about old jobs that we used to have, in the past and I was talking about how I nearly did a PhD instead of a PGCE (that took me straight into teaching). I have often wondered how things might have changed if I had taken that different path. I might not have met my wife or been at the University of Ulster, Coleraine at the same time as she was for one year. We might not have got married . . . had kids. . . . everything would have been different.
But, I don’t believe in regrets. I believe that there is a plan for our lives and that I have continued to follow what I was meant to be doing. I know I was meant to do a PGCE and become a teacher. I knew from the first time I stepped to the front of a class that this was what I was meant to be doing. I knew that when I got my first job that this was what I was born to do. I had to work hard to become good at being a teacher but I watched others, I looked up to role models (like Bill Harpur and later Bobby Jennings) and I asked questions and asked for help when I needed it. I knew when it was time to move to be the Head of Geography at Slemish College. Geography was (and still is) my passion. I love teaching Geography – I have read many books on geography and education to improve my practice. I have done every course and qualification I could get my hands on. I climbed the ladder. My leadership moved from one department to whole school. My impact on learners increased from one subject to all subjects.
Yes – there have been times when I have applied for other posts and I have not got them. It hurt at the time as I know what I am capable of. But, I am comforted by the reminder that there is a plan and that whilst sometimes I cannot see what I am meant to be doing . . . sometimes the reminders come quickly. There have been bullets that have been dodged. There have been situations that I managed to avoid that might have been hard to sort out. I don’t regret going for them – sometimes you have to push the door to see if it will open.
I’ve always felt that God had a purpose for me in my life. I believe that he has a purpose for everyone. That everyone has been given a gift/talent to enable them to serve others n a way that few others can. My purpose is to support people – teachers and learners to achieve their very peak of endeavour. To push themselves to their very best. To not miss opportunities. To grab everything and to try and become the best versions of themselves.
Yes – there’s times when I wish things went differently. But, I don’t have any regrets about who I am or what I do. I am not defined by my job. I am someone who is busy but who hopefully still has time for people. I am someone who wants to support others to be their best. There are still things I want to do, things I want to achieve – but I’ve had a really fun, engaging, full life so far. My aim is to make a difference. To not have regrets. I don’t really look back to the past. It’s not that I don’t like that – I just don’t understand what the point is – I see some people who meet up with old school chums to compare their loves since then. I don’t really care – I have moved on from those days (I moved on about 33 years go, to be fair). I love for tomorrow not yesterday.
As Edith Piaf once sung
Non, je ne regrette rien
